Author Archive

  • A List for the Shallow: Pride Edition (2012)

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    Our annual shallow list will be just around the corner folks. But we didn’t want to get too far away from pride month without turning the tables on our authors a little bit. Marina picked out ten women (plus some honorable mentions) that get her blood going just a little bit. Andrew ogled the men over the past year (if you listen to the Cinecast, that ain’t much of a surprise) and picked out ten that he and Louis C.K. could do nasty things to together. No disrespect intended; in fact quite the opposite. We admire these people. We admire them so much we want to see them with no clothes on so we can properly pay our respects.

    Same rules apply from the previous years: each entry on the list had to have starred in at least one major motion picture over the past year of 2011. Other than that, there is no criteria. The people ranked on these lists are there solely for their physical appearance; film quality, personality or acting prowess has no bearing on their rank (in general). Feel free to leave commentary on our picks in the comment section below and by all means, give us your list of same sex crushes. We’re always interested. So that’s enough babbling; let the voyeurism begin!

    Previous Pride Shallow List:
    2011

    Previous Regular Shallow Lists:
    2011 list
    2009 list
    2008 list

    See all the hotties under the fold…
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  • A List for the Shallow: Pride Edition (2011)

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    We just can’t seem to help ourselves. It’s too much fun to make lists and it’s even more fun to gaze at our favorite pretty celebrities on Google Image search. But wait you ask, it’s in the middle of the year; don’t you usually do this in January? Well yes we do, but being that Pride week has just ended and again, see the first sentence, we thought we’d try again… with a bit of a twist. As confident heterosexuals, Marina and Andrew decided to swap responsibilities and make shallow lists of the same sex for a change. If nothing else it should trigger some interesting debate from the peanut gallery.

    Same rules apply from the previous years: each entry on the list had to have starred in at least one major motion picture over the past year of 2010 (2011 counts). Other than that, there is no criteria. The people ranked on these lists are there solely for their physical appearance; film quality, personality or acting prowess has no bearing on their rank (in general). So that’s enough babbling; let the voyeurism begin!

    Yearly Regular List:
    2011 list
    2009 list
    2008 list

    See all the hotties under the fold…
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  • 2011 Top Ten List for the Shallow

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    Alright; we’re back with the list you’ve all been waiting for: our one shallow post of the year. Thanks to everyone for indulging us (as if you didn’t want this list posted). Andrew and Marina spent hours scouring Google images for the hottest stars (physically) working today. It’s really hard work but someone around here has got to do it. Because we didn’t get around to posting a list for 2010*, we’ve actually got a couple newer entries this year and a little bit more shifting in the positions** than usual.

    Same rules apply from the previous years: each entry on the list had to have starred in at least one major motion picture over the past year of 2010 (no television stars). Other than that, there is no criteria. The people ranked on these lists are there solely for their physical appearance; film quality, personality or acting prowess has no bearing on their rank (in general). So that’s enough babbling; let the voyeurism begin!

    * = actually Marina did her part, Andrew procrastinated.
    ** = last year’s rank number is actually from the 2009 list.

    2009 list
    2008 list

    See all the hotties under the fold…
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  • Review: Robin Hood

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    Robin Hood Movie Poster

    Director: Ridley Scott (Alien, Blade Runner, Black Hawk Down, Kingdom of Heaven)
    Writer: Brian Helgeland
    Producers: Russell Crowe, Brian Grazer, Ridley Scott
    Starring: Russell Crowe, Cate Blanchett, Max von Sydow, William Hurt, Mark Strong, Oscar Isaac, Danny Huston, Eileen Atkins, Mark Addy, Matthew Macfadyen, Kevin Durand, Scott Grimes, Alan Doyle
    MPAA Rating: PG-13
    Running time: 140 min.

     

    NOTE: Due to a little bit of a scheduling snafu, more than one contributor here simultaneously wrote up thoughts on the film. Rather than delete either of these exquisitely written pieces, and in an effort to keep all discussion confined to one cozy location, we’ve decided to publish both posts into one for potentially conflicting and more interesting opinion as well as additional fodder to wallow in; all in the name of better discussion.


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  • Full Cannes Line-Up Announced Today

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    Few things make us happier than a festival announcement, especially one as important and well respected as Cannes and for a day, Andrew and Marina have been plotting how to unleash these titles on the world.

    Basically, if you’ve been following any of the speculation of who will/who won’t that has been circling for weeks, few titles on this list will surprise you. What may surprise is the omission of a few eagerly anticipated titles perhaps most notably Terrence Malick’s The Tree of Life; which many of us around these parts have been eagerly anticipating for going on two years now. The rumors that it might debut at Cannes have been rampant the last few weeks but apparently the film is just not ready yet. Well, perhaps by TIFF time eh?

    Also notably absent is the newest Julian Schnabel (Before Night Falls, Diving Bell And Butterfly) picture, Miral; which brings us some always welcome Willem Dafoe as well as the return of Slumdog Millionaire’s Freida Pinto. Apparently Cannes wanted Schnabel to screen Miral out of competition but in the main festival. To which he replied, thanks, but no thanks. The result is that Miral will debut in Venice, and then go to Toronto next September. In Toronto, Schnabel may also have a huge exhibition of his art simultaneously.

    Speaking of Diving Bell, star Mathieu Amalric’s newly directed film, Tournée will debut at Cannes this year as well as Diego Luna’s directorial fiction debut, Abel will make an appearance. There are a few other good things as well including Im Sang-soo’s gorgeous looking remake of The Housemaid, Takeshi Kitano’s return to the underworld in Outrage and even a little Doug Liman actioner (I know…from Jumper to Cannes? Who would have thought?).

    The Death of Mister Lazarescu director Cristi Puiu returns with a crime story while Canadian superstar Xavier Dolan follow’s up I Killed My Mother with a romantic comedy titled Les amours imaginaires and Russian director Nikita Mikalkov (of 12 fame) also returns with a new offering. Yet, among all these great titles, the one that I’m most excited to see is Gregg Araki’s Kaboom… or maybe the new Oliveira? Oh the goodness overload!

    The official Cannes site will obviously have more information about the festival and it is always possible that titles may be added or changed sporadically over the next few days. But you’ll have to do a lot of the title research on your own. Of course you can download the Festival Press Kit for more info on the films, but we’ve also been gracious enough to transcribe all of the festival’s titles and jurors beneath the seats, as well as adding some images and links to trailers. We’ll be updating the post regularly with new links so check back often!

    Opening Night
    Ridley Scott’s Robin Hood (watch the trailer)

    Out of Competition
    Oliver Stone’s Wall Street: Money Never Sleeps (watch the trailer)
    Woody Allen’s You Will Meet A Tall Dark Stranger
    Stephen Frear’s Tamara Drewe

     
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  • UPDATED: Retro Futuristic Black Lightning Teaser!

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    UPDATE: QuietEarth just hooked us up with essentially the same trailer, but now there is a face behind the wheel of this retro-fitted flying car. Check out the slightly updated trailer below.

    Black LightningHave I told you lately how much I love you Quiet Earth? Maybe not but when you bring me greatness like this, what’s not to love?

    If you’re already itching for more overblown fun from Russian helmer Timur Bekmambetov (of Wanted (our review) Daywatch, Nightwatch fame), you’re going to have to wait a little longer for his next directing gig but you’re still in for a treat. Aside from his producing credit on the awesome looking animated film 9, Bekmambetov also has a number of other producing gigs on the go but it looks like the next one out of the gate will be the Russian superhero film Black Lightning. How awesome is that title?

    As you may have guessed the film revolves around a car, specifically a used Volga which is purchased by a student at a Moscow university. The car happens to have the ability to fly and overnight, the car turns the guy into a superhero who must defend the city against evil.

    The film hasn’t even started shooting and it’s already generating buzz; likely thanks to Bekmambetov’s comment that this is the “Russian response for Transformers and Batman.” I’m definitely looking forward to seeing what the filmmakers have up their sleeves and if the teaser is any indication, they’re taking a lot of direction from Bekmambetov (the teaser features one his signature slow motion shots).

    It’s all pretty vague but I have to admit that since Bekmambetov’s explosion onto the scene, I’m really curious to see the influence he’s had on popular Russian filmmaking and if this is any indication, it looks like he’s pretty much blown the doors wide open.

    Teaser is tucked under the seat!

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  • R3view: Fast and Furious

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    Fast and Furious poster

    Director: Justin Lin (Better Luck Tomorrow, Fast and the Furious: Tokyo Drift, Annapolis)
    Writer: Chris Morgan (Cellular, Wanted, Fast and Furious: Tokyo Drift)
    Producers:Vin Diesel, Michael Fottrell, Neal H. Moritz
    Starring: Vin Diesel, Paul Walker, Jordana Brewster, John Ortiz, Gal Gadot, Michelle Rodriguez
    MPAA Rating: PG-13
    Running time: 107 min


    Not a true R3view as only two of us were actually brave enough to head out to the multi-plex to see the fourth installment in the F&F franchise. While most consider this series to be one step up from cow dung, we (Andrew and Marina) admit to the first film being quite a fun guilty pleasure. Bringing back the original cast for this most recent segment of the thread was enough for us to get out, buckle up and prepare for one helluva ride… maybe.

    Synopsis:
    Dom (Diesel) and crew are still up their old tricks; hijacking rigs for their valuable contents. Now on the run from the law however, they’re forced to work their racket in smaller countries such as the Dominican Republic. When an unexpected plot twist forces Dom to return to The States (Los Angeles), he knows the law will be breathing down his neck the second he crosses the border. Luckily for him he’s got a friend on the inside (Paul Walker). Together they work on the inside of a major crime syndicate; one of them out for justice, the other out for revenge. Fast cars and general mayhem ensue.

    read all of our reviews below…
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  • 2009 Top Ten List for the Shallow

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    Alright; as promised we’re back with the list you’ve all been waiting for: our one shallow post of the year. Thanks to everyone for indulging us – as if you didn’t want this list posted. When I say “us,” I mean Andrew and Marina. We spent hours scouring Google images for the hottest stars (physically) working today. It’s really hard work but someone around here has got to do it; and c’mon, admit it… even you ultra-snobby film types like to work in the occasional ogle once in a while, so this post is for you too.

    We did something a little bit different this year and decided that each entry on the list had to have starred in at least one major motion picture over the past year of 2008 (no television stars). Other than that, there is no criteria. The people ranked on these lists are there solely for their physical appearance; film quality, personality or acting prowess has no bearing on their rank (in general). So that’s enough babbling; let the voyeurism begin!

    Last year’s list

    See all the hotties under the fold…
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  • Happy New Year! – Top Ten Hotties

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    This is as shallow as it gets folks. While we generally hate the tabloid section of entertainment and gossip magazines and web sites and while we never (or almost never) credit or discredit a film based upon how attrractive the stars are, we are still human. So we’d like to take this once a year opportunity, to wallow in the cold shallowness of the sex appeal of the stars. Andrew and Marina (with a little help from co-host Colleen) have put together our hottest looking babes and hunks of the current generation. This is not a list of the sexiest stars of all time. That would be damn near impossible. With one exception, these are current stars and all images were taken in the last year or two (roughly).

    Now, when I say shallow, I mean exactly that. This list is in no way based on intelligence, acting prowess, awards or personality. This is strictly physical. The second bit of criteria is that the nominee must be a full fledged movie star. Television actors or musicians need not apply. I generally went with the rule of thumb that the actor or actress must at least have a supporting role in at least three major film releases. But that’s a rule of thumb, not necessarily a prerequisite. Other than that, there’s no criteria; these are just our opinions folks. They may change from year to year or even week to week. Have a gander at the list and post your thoughts. In fact, feel free to post your own top ten. This is some of the most fun film “research” we’ve ever done. HAPPY NEW YEAR!

    See all the hotties under the fold…
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