Star Wars Going Off the Deep End…

…And you know what? I’m kind of liking it. Story stolen from EW.

 

A young Han Solo saga, focusing on the wisecracking smuggler’s origin story, and a bounty hunter adventure with Boba Fett at the center of a rogue’s gallery of galactic scum…

The Han Solo story would take place in the time period between “Revenge of the Sith” and the first Star Wars (now known as “A New Hope”), so although it’s possible Harrison Ford could appear as a framing device, the movie would require a new actor for the lead — one presumably much younger than even the 35-year-old Ford when he appeared in the 1977 original.

The Boba Fett film would take place either between “A New Hope” and “The Empire Strikes Back,” or between “Empire” and “Jedi,” where the bounty hunter was last seen plunging unceremoniously into a sarlacc pit. Exactly who would play him isn’t much of a complication – in the original trilogy, he never took off his helmet. And in the prequels, we learned he was the son of the original stormtrooper clone, played by Temuera Morrison, who’s still the right age for the part if his services were required.

In addition to bringing back two fan-favorite characters as the leads of their own films, the Han Solo and Boba Fett projects would also allow Darth Vader, in full-on black death-metal gear, to return as a villain, since placing the spin-offs within the original trilogy would mean he is still alive and hissing. That timeline would also open the door for a return from visit with everyone’s favorite degenerate slug-like gangster, Jabba the Hutt.

Everything about this screams terrible terrible idea. But you know what? In hindsight, “Phantom Menace” was a terrible terrible idea too (though not as outright awful as “Attack of the Clones”). So I figure they can’t fuck it up anymore, so why not just go for broke? I mean outside of Serenity how many good (or any at all) big screen, space battle movies in the past few years have there been; so might as well give me more Star Wars.

Sure a young Han Solo played by Ashton Kutcher or some other up and coming douche is probably the worst idea sine Greedo shooting first (copyright Kevin Smith), but again, I can always go back and watch Episodes IV-VI and be perfectly happy with Harrison Ford doing his thing. Nothing will every change that so why worry too much about it? Besides, what if they actually were able to find someone as awesome as the next Nathan Fillion to play the part (Gosling, Rockwell, Garfield, Sturgess, McConaughey, maybe even Fassbender in “young make-up”)? At the very least it’s something to talk about and probably have some fun with. Also, I’m happy to see other parts of the Star Wars galaxy along with more laser guns, more Jedi tricks and I’m certainly anxious to see the Falcon do more loop-de-loops.

Boba-Fett is an even easier character and doesn’t matter if it isn’t Jeremy Bullock Hell no. It will just be a cool looking battle gear dude hunting down scum in the galaxy. And if it requires taking the helmet off, have the kid from “Clones” play the part – as mentioned in the article above, he’s old enough. Should be awesome with the right creative minds behind it.

So all you people screaming that Disney is raping Star Wars (I haven’t read much about it in the past few days, but I can only assume this is happening), get over it. Star Wars was raped almost fifteen years ago and then again with the Blu-ray releases. So let’s just keep going and see if something sticks. It will be a hell of an event and most likely it will be a lot of fun – even if it’s terrible. And even more fun to dissect for weeks before and after each subsequent release.

Andrew James
Podcaster. Tech junkie. Movie lover. Also games and guitar. I dig music.