I’ve seen some bad films in my time but it’s been years since I willingly turned off a movie before the halfway point, never mind the end. I even try to give the worse of them (Blades of Glory comes to mind) a “just in case” chance but David Wain’s The Ten is so bad, I couldn’t get past the 5th act.
A collection of short films, each based on one of the ten commandments, the idea behind the film sounds like it could be fun and with a cast that includes Famke Janssen, Gretchen Mol, Oliver Platt, Paul Rudd, Liev Schreiber, Justin Theroux, Winona Ryder, Adam Brody and Jessica Alba looking as hot as ever, you figure there has to be something worthwhile about the project but throw in a bunch of good actors, trying to be funny with lame, LAME material, and this is what you get; a mess of short films, each one less funny than the previous. This is particularly difficult to do in its own right considering that the first story is about a guy who jumps out of a plane without a parachute and ends up stuck in the ground. It starts off a little funny – for about 10 seconds – and then it gets old. And then they beat the freakin’ dead dog for another 10 minutes. WHY?
And that’s nothing compared to the rest of the mess that follows. Winona Ryder falling for a ventriloquist doll is only mildly funny. When she decides to madly screw the bloody doll like it was the last time she was ever going to have sex well, that was down right disturbing and again – not funny. I reached near breaking point when we got to the coveting of thy neighbor’s wife and the story was told as an inmate being coveted by another in ‘pound you up the ass’ prison. Male rape, ANY type of rape, NOT FUNNY.
I can understand that maybe I’m not part of the target demographic for this film but I find the entire thing completely distasteful and can’t understand how anyone could find any of this material even remotely funny. There was no suppressed giggle, not even a smirk on our faces while watching the bit of this we managed to get through. What strikes me as stranger still is how, and why, some of these actors ever became involved with this film to begin with. To push buttons? Jackass was genius movie making compared to this mess.
I was really interested in watching Wain’s first film, Wet Hot American Summer but now I’m not so sure I ever want to see any of this guy’s work. To boot, I’ve even lost a little respect for Paul Rudd, who I adore. True, he and Janssen are the closest thing to good that this movie has but it’s not nearly enough to make any of it worth while.
Not only is The Ten a waste of time, it’s a waste of the DVD it’s printed on. I’ve never been so disgusted by a film that I couldn’t find anything worthwhile to mention but there’s a first time for everything.
I must also apologize to the hubby who sat there quietly, taking it all in until I finally turned it off. You get to pick the movies on our next trip to the video store.
Their should be a warning that copious amounts of psychotropic drugs are required to “get” the movie.
But man, I totally dug the ridiculousness of it. It’s about as anti-convention as you will find in a situation comedy.
Oh see, and I thought it was well past the ridiculous and into the obscene. I guess the drugs may have helped a bit but I’m not buying it. I’d rather watch The jackass guys give themselves tongue paper cuts.
Oh man… I was looking forward to this film. The trailer we watch months ago, looked really funny. I am sorry you have wasted a small portion of you exsistance on a truelly bad film Marina! I guess this is a case of all the funny bits WERE in the trailer.
Oh it most certainly was obscene. That’s why it was funny. I’m assuming you have never watched The State?
Now I totally hope Cannibal Halocaust wins for the next podcast. I can’t wait to hear your take on it. Word of warning, bring a vomit bag.
Psychotropic drugs? I think maybe bourbon would do. That’s how I got through Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band….
Probably. This movie would kill as a midnight film.
@ Matt – I’m hopipng CC wins it too. I recently came into 2 copies of the freakin’ film and now I need an excuse to watch it. And no, I’ve never seen “The State”.
And I don’t know, I think I can deal with obscene but maybe not as much as I thought.
I’m still looking forward to this. Marina – have you ever seen the TV show “Stella” or the other film they were behind, “wet Hot American Summer” – both oddball and strangely subversive about otherwise harmless topics (or lack thereof)
No I haven’t seen either and to be honest I’m sort of on the fence about “Wet Hot American Summer”, even though I’ve heard some great stuff about it. I haven’t removed it from my movie list. Maybe the traumatization will be gone by the time it arrives.
Thanks for the warning Marina.
Wet Hot American Summer is far more tame then The Ten. It’s probably easier to work your way up to their style of humor if you watch The Baxter first and work your way up to The Ten. And even then The Ten is basically one of those comedies where you either you like it or you don’t. No harm no foul if it doesn’t do it for you.
@ Simone – You’re very welcome.
@ Matt – Cool. When it arrives, I’ll give WHAS a viewing. All the reviews I’ve read have been very positive.
Actually Marina, as much as I love WHAS, it for the most part was viciously ripped by critics. The Stella/State guys are a VERY acquired taste. You’d probably be better off torrenting eps of Stella (you dont necessarily have to watch them in order, though i prefer it that way for no good reason) to really get a taste of what they’re going for. There’s so much deadpan highbrow irony going on mixed with shallow l.c.d. humor that I’ve only met a select few who really get down with it
Those few however end up my favorite people.